At The Movies:'Sugar & Spice'

You can almost see them, can't you? Studio executives, sitting around a table, desperately trying to figure out how to cash in on the teen movie craze. <br><br>They're thinking, ``Bring It On''

Thursday, January 25th 2001, 12:00 am

By: News On 6

You can almost see them, can't you? Studio executives, sitting around a table, desperately trying to figure out how to cash in on the teen movie craze.

They're thinking, ``Bring It On'' made a ton of money last summer. That was about high-school cheerleaders. Maybe another cheerleader movie would make a ton of money, too â€” especially if it featured gun-toting, bank-robbing cheerleaders.

Hence we have ``Sugar & Spice,'' which sounds like a porno movie from its title; if it were X-rated, it certainly couldn't be any worse.

Basically, it's a rehash of ``Bring It On,'' with the same smart-mouthed pep squadders but without the same smart humor, crossed with ``Set It Off,'' the 1996 movie with Queen Latifah as one of four black women who go on a bank robbery spree.

This time, we have five white high-school girls, dressed in red-and-blue cheerleader uniforms and evil-looking, blond rubber doll masks, who stick up a grocery-store bank branch.

Why, you ask? Because their cloyingly perky squad captain, Diane (Marley Shelton, a Heather Graham look-alike), has gotten pregnant by the star quarterback, Jack (James Marsden).

(Get it, Jack and Diane? Like the John Mellencamp song? Never mind.)

Like her hero Madonna singing ``Papa Don't Preach,'' Diane has made up her mind â€” she's keeping her baby, and she needs money.

The girls have taken a cheerleader ``Oath of Allegiance and Conformity,'' so they go in on the heist together. What else do they have to do? They're all two-dimensional characters.

Kansas (Mena Suvari) is the tough-talking rebel whose mother (Sean Young, unrecognizable in a cameo) is in prison for life for killing her father.

Hannah (Rachel Blanchard) is the wholesome churchgoer who has an unusual affinity for horses.

Cleo (Melissa George), meanwhile, is obsessed with Conan O'Brien, a joke that wasn't funny the first time and still isn't funny an hour later.

And Lucy (Sara Marsh) is the brain. All she cares about is getting into Harvard.

There's also Lisa (Marla Sokoloff), a B-squad cheerleader who would do anything to make the A-squad. She discovers the girls' hideous crime and somehow pops up at the most opportune moments to try to expose them.

It's hard to care about any of these characters because none of them remotely resembles a human being. Even the freaks and geeks, who might have been interesting, are stereotypes.

The cynicism that is rampant in teen movies these days has grown tedious. What ``Sugar & Spice'' tries to pass off as biting, sardonic wit is simply over-the-top, forced humor.

It's also surprising, in the wake of the Columbine High School shootings and other school violence in recent years, that this movie was even made.

In the end, though, it all comes down to money. ``Sugar & Spice'' may not make a ton of it, but teen-age moviegoers probably will help it make a decent mark on the box office.

``Sugar & Spice,'' a New Line Cinema release, was directed by Francine McDougall and written by Mandy Nelson. It is rated PG-13 for language, sex-related humor and some thematic elements. Running time: 80 minutes.

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Motion Picture Association of America rating definitions:

G â€” General audiences. All ages admitted.

PG â€” Parental guidance suggested. Some material may not be suitable for children.

PG-13 â€” Special parental guidance strongly suggested for children under 13. Some material may be inappropriate for young children.

R â€” Restricted. Under 17 requires accompanying parent or adult guardian.

NC-17 â€” No one under 17 admitted.