Widow blesses minister with husband's kidney

Monday, November 27th 2000, 12:00 am

By: News On 6

GASTONIA, N.C. (AP) _ A Lutheran minister who waited two years for a kidney transplant has a new organ thanks to a gift from the husband of a woman he baptized and had not seen for years.

``It just, you know, overwhelmed me that they might want to consider an old man,'' said Ray Kaylor, 61, who is recovering from transplant surgery at Carolinas Medical Center. ``I'm just humbled by their thoughts toward me.''

The kidney came from Michael Eddy, 23, who died while visiting Myrtle Beach, S.C., on his postponed honeymoon with his wife, Bethann, 19. The Toledo, Ohio, couple was married in July and was expecting a baby in May.

It is unusual for recipients and the families of deceased donors to know each other, and they are discouraged from making contact, at least until some time passes. But if a donor's family knows someone who needs a transplant, they can ask that the organ be given to that person.

``It's not done that often,'' said Dr. Lon Eskind, one of Kaylor's surgeons.

``But it's certainly a wonderful way of giving in a time when something horrible has happened. I see day to day how people struggle in organ failure. And when we're able to transplant them and their lives completely change, it's really an unbelievable thing. It gives you a warm feeling about human nature.''

Eskind performed Kaylor's transplant Wednesday. The retired pastor of Redeemer Lutheran Church in Gastonia is recovering well and was in good condition Monday.

Bethann Eddy said her husband began having difficulty breathing during dinner Nov. 16 at Medieval Times. He had asthma and thought he might be having an allergic reaction, she said. He got up to go outside for air, and when he didn't return shortly, she found him lying down, turning red, at the front of the restaurant.

Some doctors thought he might have been allergic to something he ate, but Bethann Eddy said he didn't eat anything unusual. Because he was allergic to cats and dogs, she said she thinks he had an allergic reaction to the horses in the medieval show.

Doctors soon told Bethann Eddy that her husband was brain dead and asked if she would consider donating his organs. Michael had checked ``yes'' for organ donor on his driver's license, so she agreed.

By Tuesday, when Michael's condition had not improved, his heart, lungs, liver, pancreas, kidneys, bone, tissue and skin were donated. Bethann Eddy remembered that a few days earlier her grandmother had mentioned the minister who needed a kidney, so she asked, ``Could we give it to him?''

At 2 a.m. Wednesday, Ray Kaylor got the call that he should come quickly to the hospital and prepare for transplant surgery. Kaylor's surgery began about 6 p.m. on the day before Thanksgiving.

``The surgeons came out a little after 10,'' said his wife, Gloria Kaylor. ``They said the kidney started working immediately.''

As a boy, Ray Kaylor had had nephritis _ also known as Bright's disease _ and had always had high levels of creatinine, an indication of poor kidney health. He developed further signs of kidney failure eight years ago. He retired from his church two years ago, when he started having daily kidney dialysis and was put on the transplant list.

``It has really been a blessing. It's like a dream,'' his wife said.

Bethann Eddy was back in Ohio when she learned that Michael's kidney had matched Kaylor's. She also heard that someone in South Carolina got his liver, pancreas and other kidney.

Her husband's funeral was Monday, and Bethann Eddy isn't ready to contact the organ recipient.

``My grandmother said that when I was ready and when I was up to it, Pastor Kaylor wanted to baptize our baby,'' she said.