Oklahoma Mom Says Pandemic Increased Challenges For Autistic Son

An Oklahoma mother said she's struggling with people being rude to her, when it comes to her son who has special needs.

She said kids with autism need extra patience and the pandemic has made things harder. She said his special needs lead him defenseless, and the pandemic has made his diagnosis even more apparent. 

Bibiana Villarruel's 6-year-old son Alex has autism and said she's learning to embrace it, but the pandemic has been a major setback for her family. 

"He's not aware of what's going on. Reality, right? He'll touch stuff, put fingers into his mouth,” Villarruel said. 

Villarruel said she hasn't been out of the house much since the pandemic began, because her son can't keep a mask on. 

"When we try to put on a mask, like he will just play with it,” said Villarruel. “You know, like pull it down and up and just kind of like mess with it.” 

Villarruel said people grow angry, make remarks and stare, but the lack of understanding isn't an isolated incident.

She said that earlier this month her family went to a restaurant in Broken Arrow. She said her son has a short list of foods he will eat from, and so they brought his food inside while the rest of the family ordered off the menu. 

“Approximately 5 minutes after placing our food order, the manager appeared to inform us there was to be no outside food or drinks allowed inside of the restaurant,” Villarruel said.

Villarruel said she tried to explain her son’s special circumstances and asked if they could make an exception, but said the manager refused and referenced the sign that indicated no outside food or drinks. 

“Shocked and feeling completely degraded and defenseless, I grabbed his hand and walked him outside so he could finish his food,” Villarruel said.

Villarruel said she later asked for corporate’s contact but was given a disconnected number. When she returned a few days later, Villarruel said she was given that same store location’s number. 

“They did not want to give me any information to reach corporate,” said Villarruel. “Although I never threatened or insulted her, out of frustration, I began to raise my voice at her in which she proceeded to call the police.” 

Villarruel later spoke with the police and explained the situation. She was told not to return, but said the officer was very understanding. 

“[The manager] genuinely seemed to not care about my son’s special needs or the way she made us feel,” Villarruel said. 

Villarruel said she has friends with similar stories of struggle, and all she wants is a little compassion and an open conversation. 

"It's not easy for us as parents,” said Villarruel. “If we go to a place that they don't show that they can accommodate, you know kids with special needs, I mean it's even harder for us as parents." 

Villarruel said, pandemic aside, it's a lifelong commitment for families with special needs children, and she will fight for them forever. 

“I feel exhausted. It's been like a nightmare,” said Villarruel. I'm his voice. I'm the person making sure that he's fine. I just want people to be aware of the situation." 

She said she only hopes that this teaches people how to deal with a delicate situation and believes businesses should accommodate for special needs the same way they offer disabled parking spots. 

Villarruel said she’s even considering a Facebook support group for families who have special needs children like her own.